This translation was last located at: http://members.nbci.com/elekdaisy/ZB/zbmain.html All translations from the Chinese Tong Li edition, i.e. any Japanese you see I got from the anime. The linguistic equivalent of playing 'telephone', but better than nothing. Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 5, chapter 1 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (1) [At school.] Girl A: Hey, look over there... No way. Minako? Girl B: (Wow... she's even changed her hairstyle.) Boy C: *whistle* Weird. Isn't that Captain Izumi? Boy D: For real... that stiff-neck is actually walking down the hall with a girl. (2) Girl: How's that possible? She _likes_ him? Boy C: Who _is_ the chick? Boy D: Class 2-B, Sasaki Minako... Shibuya: Uh-oh... (There's murder in the air...) [Kouji's shown up, you see.] (3) Girl A: Nice going Mi-na-ko! Thou hast not failed us! [Ozaki note: Archaic language...] Minako: Oh, darn, don't hit me! Girl B: (We'll have to haul you in for an interrogation!) Out with it. Is Izumi-sempai a sweet guy or what? Is he sensitive? Minako: Uhuh... super sensitive... though he's the silent type... Girl B: (You little... aren't you the lucky one!) Girl A: What are you talking about? Get down to the facts! What did you do? (4) Minako: Oh, spare me! We didn't... [She meets Kouji's gaze-of-ten-thousand-daggers and freezes.] Girl A: Huh? Hey, Minako... are you okay? [Kouji spins on his heels and leaves.] Minako: I... I'm not sure... (5) (flshbk) //Izumi: Where have you wandered off to all night? You have to tell me when you're going to be back, you don't know how to cook for yourself.// //Kouji: ...I thought you might have run off already.// //Izumi: Me, run? Why? Why the hell do I have to run from _you_? Listen carefully to what I'm saying. I'm going to forget what happened, so you're goddamned well going to forget it too. As soon as I get the cheque from my job, I'm moving out. Until then I'll continue to be your live-in help.// (6) //Kouji: You want me to... forget?// //Izumi: That's right. It's impossible for me to accept these feelings of yours. I don't even believe I'll ever understand you.// //Kouji: Why... can't we just be "friends," then? (7) Why can't we even...// Shibuya: You can't go on like this. What are you planning to do? (classroom noise) (Hahaha! Then I said...) (Can't stand it!) (Finished your English homework?) Izumi: What business is it of yours? Shibuya: (Tsk tsk) You're dreaming. You really have no concept of his character. Don't you realize it's the girl who's in danger now? Are you confident you can protect her? [Izumi looks shocked.] Shibuya: Do you really _like_ her that much? (8) Izumi: You... [he slams his fists down on the desk] What the hell do you _want_ me to do! What do you understand anyway! TELL ME! Shibuya: Izumi... (flshbk) //Kouji [to Michiko]: Tell me!// (9) //Izumi: I'm so messed up...// Minako: I... Here. I always see you eating buns and stuff before extracurriculars, so I made this myself. For you, if you don't mind... Izumi: Oh... you shouldn't have. Minako: It's no trouble! I like cooking. Of course, if you feel it's a bother, I won't anymore. //I feel...// Izumi: ...Thank you. //...as if I'm doing something heartless to her.// Minako: (Well, then, let's see...) (10) //I don't really love her, after all...// Izumi: Um... I... Minako: Huh? Player: Izumi sempai! The coach wants to see you right now! //It's too pathetic.// Izumi: I'm sorry. There's something I have to talk to you about, afterwards. Minako: ? All right! (I'll wait until after practice.) [Kouji's stalking about by now, listening.] Minako: Ack... I forgot his towel in the classroom! The one I spent a whole night embroidering his name on... [She runs off. Kouji smiles.] (11) [Room 2-B] Minako: Here it is! (Empty classrooms are kind of scary after school.) Kouji: Sasaki-kun. Minako: *heart skip* Ack! Yes! [Sees it's Kouji] Uh... Kouji: *smile* I have a message from Izumi-sempai. Minako: Ah...? (Strange?) (12) [Kouji no apaato] Minako: Wow! That's super! You really live together? (Oh, Izumi-sempai's uniform.) Kouji: Really. //Minako: *doki doki* Is this all right? Barging into his place... Wasn't there an important message? Why isn't he back... Izumi-sempai... (kinda scary)// Minako [glancing around]: If I may ask... (Looks like an expensive apartment.) Are you old friends with Izumi-sempai? Kouji: You can say that... About six years. Minako: That _is_ a while! Kouji: I know pretty much everything about him. Minako: It's like a dream, I can't believe it! Not only do I get to date my crush, but I'm here chatting with Nanjo Kouji. (If _they_ found out, I'd be given the third degree again.) Kouji: What do you like about him? (13) Minako [high embarrassment]: Eh? Well... I suppose the way he looks when he plays ball. So cool, like he's so into it. I never thought he'd go out with me actually, I was worried that he would dislike me if I told him... I mean, if it came to that I would rather just watch him without saying anything at all. But I finally screwed up the courage. Kouji: ...Don't make me laugh. Minako: Huh? Kouji: You're a girl, so you have no problems. (14) You can get close to him no matter what you do, because you're a girl. Apart from that, what do you have? (15) [He slams her down on the floor.] Minako: Aaahh! Stop... what are you doing! Kouji: "Because he's so cool?" You have a "crush" on him? Don't make me laugh... Minako: No! Help me, somebody! IZUMI-SEMPAI! (Players) (Good work!) (We're going out for noodles! I want ramen!) //Izumi: I don't see her... Maybe she went home.// //Why do I have a sinking feeling...// (flshbk) //Shibuya: Don't you realize it's the girl who's in danger now?// //Izumi: I haven't seen Kouji either.// [And two... plus... two... makes chicken...] //Izumi: It can't be. Kouji's probably at work, Minako's gone home...// (16) [But he runs anyway. Minako rushes, disheveled, out the door as Izumi reaches it.] Minako: No... NO! Izumi: Sasaki... (17) [She runs off. Izumi charges in to find Kouji smoking a cigarette half-undressed on the bed. Asshole. No, really.] Kouji: ...You're back. Izumi: You... bastard! What did you do to her? Kouji: You're just as much at fault. You were using her too. [Mind you, he has a point...] (18) Kouji: You wanted to run from me so much, you were forced to use her. And weren't you the bleeding heart who said you'd never do that to a girl, you'd feel too sorry? Your kindness toward women isn't even as strong as your feelings for me, no matter what _they_ are. You were using her for me... (19) [He pushes Izumi back onto the bed.] Kouji: Don't you know how much I love you! [He kisses Izumi.] Izumi: Uh..n... [He bites Kouji's lip, making it bleed.] Kouji: If you knew, why didn't you just destroy me... (20) [And goes right back to kissing Izumi.] Kouji: Bite as much as you want. Like this. Hide as much as you want. Let me die choking on my own blood... You're wondering how far I'm going to push my luck, aren't you... reckless as I am... (21) [Izumi sort of... gives in. As Lady Amore said in Bakuretsu Hunters, it's the energy sometimes that gets to you...] Kouji: Izumi... //Izumi: Why...// Kouji: I'm in pain, it's so cruel... please save me... //Does it have to be like this.// (22) Izumi: Let me go. Please. Let me go apologize to her. //It's my responsibility...// [Kouji stares down at him in silence.] (23) //Because I have nowhere else to run to...// (24) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 5, chapter 2 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (25) //--Twelve years ago, after _that_ happened, the three of us were shunted back and forth between relatives. For the five-year-old me, the faces of those unknown relations were like demons. I did everything to protect my sister and brother, I no longer believed in anyone or anything. But now, twelve years later, I'm finally beginning to understand why my father smiled as the knife came down, and why my mother took the life of the man she loved with her own hands. And then, (26) There was Kouji, like a flashback from the past, merciless, as if he would swallow me alive... that was how he broke into my world. How frightening... Everything I've hoped to protect for so long is about to crumble.// Mrs. Sasaki: ...nako. Minako! That boy is outside, are you sure you don't want to see him? (27) Minako! Minako [crying into her pillow]: I'm fine! Don't bother me! //How cruel...// //I hurt a girl, an innocent bystander. And all because I was trying to escape...// (flshbk) //Kouji: Please save me...// (28) //I did something irreparable!// [Hours later] Minako [glancing out the window]: !! [She rushes out. Izumi's still waiting by the gate, looking very sorry indeed... for all the good that does.] (29) Minako: Sempai... Izumi: I'm sorry. Minako: Why... do you have to apologize to me? Izumi: Because I'm responsible. It's not something an apology can make better, but I really am sorry. (30) Izumi: I can't go out with you anymore. I won't let you be hurt again because of me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I know it's selfish of me; I'd do anything to make up for it, so... Minako: Izumi-sempai. In three days... my father's being transferred to Kyushu. Izumi: Ah... Minako: So I thought, last chance, why not, even if I don't succeed it wouldn't matter. That's why I finally asked you. (31) I didn't think you would say yes... I was so happy, at the time. Will you... tell me something? Izumi-sempai... You already... have someone, don't you? [Izumi stares back at her a moment, then closes his eyes.] Izumi: I thought at first that I could just ignore him, but... I can't. Because I know how serious his love is. (32) I'm sorry... I can't say any more. //Perhaps this is also a kind of cruelty...// Izumi: I don't know myself... //But if I just leave like this,// Izumi: I mean, I hate it... //He might...// Izumi: I know it doesn't work. //Unless what I feel for him// Izumi: What I should do... //is love...?// (33) Minako: You... you're so strange. The two of you... Like this, it's... it's not normal, it's too twisted. It's wrong! It's _dirty_... //Dirty...// [Izumi looks shocked. I suppose out of all words, that's one that hadn't occurred to him. Kouji is, BTW, listening to the entire conversation from around the corner.] (34) Minako: Sempai, you don't really love him, do you? You're just feeling sorry for him, thinking that he'd be in a bad way if you ignore him, right? But I think that's even more heartless! Izumi-sempai's gentleness and sympathy is just another kind of cruelty! Minako: Even now... I really love sempai! I love you ten times more than him! I'm a girl, isn't it more normal with me? I have more of a right! (35) Or do you really like him after all? Is that why you feel it's all right to dump me, but take pity on him? You're both guys! It's disgusting! [Well, y'know, win some, lose some, they can't all be yaoi fans even in Japan...] Izumi: Then... if I were a girl, would you still love me? (36) [Kouji looks like he'd just been beaned by a sledgehammer. Well, let's not underestimate Izumi's mode of thought. Slow and steady wins the race.] Minako: Uh... Izumi: Do you like me as a person, or is it just because I'm-a-guy-you're-a-girl-and-nature-takes-its-course? (37) Minako: Um... no, but... 'cause Sempai _is_ a guy, so... [As el Kouji steps out of the shadows] Ah! Kouji: If it were me... it wouldn't matter if he were male or female, or a cat or dog, or plant, or machine. (38) I would seek him out, and I would certainly end by falling in love with him. That's how much I love him, so I beg you, don't take him from me... [Well, it's sweet, but... plant...?] //I beg you, don't...// Minako: Izumi-sempai... [Pause, and she smiles.] Goodbye... //take him from me...// (39) //Goodbye...// Izumi: I... I didn't say I was in love with you. Just that I'm starting to have some idea of what it means, to love someone... (40) Kouji: Mm... It's enough. //After that,// Kouji: You don't need to say any more. //Kouji didn't say anything else to me.// Izumi: It's so hot... //But still, I...// (41) (Minako's letter) //Izumi-sempai,// Agent: You'll have to pay the first month's rent upfront, that is tomorrow. Izumi: All right. //Are you well? I'm fine. I'm ashamed of myself, though. To have lived with such a narrow-minded attitude makes me feel that I've been a thoroughly unlikeable person.// Agent: The landlord's a good man; you rarely find them like that nowadays. So when are you moving in? //"Like" and "love" have nothing to do with rights or fairness. It's so simple and obvious, but I didn't understand at all, even though I was in love myself.// Izumi: Immediately. //Though I feel as if I'd never forgive him, I discredited the value and power of his feelings, and I'm sorry for it.// Agent: Thanks for coming! //I have the sensation that I've lost to him... (42) Unhappy with the result, but still, I've lost without contest...// //Izumi: They're already tearing down the orphanage...// [There's a lady standing in front of the orphanage. As Izumi approaches, she turns and he recognizes her.] Izumi's mother: Taku...to... Izumi: Mother... (43) You. You're Mother... [Yeah, the weirdness never stops. I suppose she's out on parole.] *sound of motorcycle approaching* Izumi's mother: You've grown so tall. I almost didn't recognize you. ...You're shocked, aren't you? (44) You must have thought I'd died, isn't that right? Izumi [who has in no way snapped out of it yet]: Ah... [Kouji pulls up behind them on his bike.] Izumi's mother: I saw it immediately. You look almost exactly like him when he was young... (45) Izumi: Why... Why did you come back now! Izumi's mother: Because there's something I absolutely had to tell you. (46) That's the only thing that's kept me alive... [Kouji walks up from behind and takes Izumi's shoulders in a highly protective manner.] (47) Kouji: Would you happen to be his mother? Izumi's mother: ...You're Takuto's friend? Izumi: No... she's not! She's not! This woman isn't my mother! (48) My mother died twelve years ago, with my father! So it isn't her! Kouji [giving him a firm shake]: Izumi! Izumi: Kou... Kouji: Why... why are you still alive? Didn't you kill the love of your life? How did you stay alive, these twelve years? Or did your feelings end there? (49) Izumi's mother: It's because I love him that I couldn't follow him, no matter how much I tried... These twelve years have been my greatest penance. There's... something I have to say, no matter what. I'm sure that in the depth of his heart, my son is nursing an immense misunderstanding about me. Kouji: Then, why don't you come in, and we can talk? Izumi-sempai's and my home is just around the block. (50) [In the apartment...] Izumi's mother: ...Twelve years ago, his father - who had chosen me over soccer, his greatest love - regretted his choice. Or rather, he was immensely pained by the fact of his regret. He felt he chose as he did because he truly loved me, you see, and he didn't understand why he would have second thoughts... His eyes were always so full of sorrow. (51) Izumi's mother: Faced with universal opposition, we eloped, giving up everything, and had you. We thought we would be happy. But he never found happiness... And then I, yearning to have him all to myself, killed him. Izumi's mother: I would have done anything at all, as long as I could possess him. Even if my dear child had to suffer misfortune, I would have. Izumi: I don't understand... I don't understand why you had to! Don't you see that it was selfish of you! (52) Izumi's mother: Yes... you're right. Even though he wanted to die at my hands, I should have found some other way... Takuto, even though I have no right to say I'm a mother at all, still there's one thing I understand. If someone's really the love of my life, then I have to be willing to do anything for that other. If I don't want to leave him, I have to do my utmost not to part with him. If I fear becoming his burden, I have to do my utmost not to burden him. (53) Nothing is unachievable; saying that is only cowardice. If you really love, there are no impossibilities. If you can't attain that, then how can you call it true love? Love that consists of harming each other isn't love, it's mere willfulness... Izumi's mother: Takuto, when you ran out to protect your father, my heart almost stopped. (54) Not mercy... but because you're my proof that I loved him. I loved him so... [She embraces him] I'm sorry, Takuto... It hurt, didn't it? It must have hurt, mustn't it? Takuto... I'm sorry. (55) Izumi's mother: Goodbye... [Kouji watches from the window as she gets into a taxi.] Kouji: ...Izumi... I have a feeling... that she might be going to her death. (56) Izumi: What are you saying... Kouji: Maybe she really only endured these twelve years to tell you these things. Now that she's done so, she has no more reason to live. So... Kouji: If we follow by motorcycle, we might still catch up! IZUMI!! (57) [Motorcycle it is...] Kouji: I remember it being a beige taxi! Izumi: How'll we find it going by that? What about the license plate? Kouji: I didn't get a good look! Any idea where she might have gone? Izumi: How would I know! Kouji: Damn, where did it go! [Sees taxi] Ah, that one! There! (58) [He draws up parallel to the taxi and starts kicking the door with one foot while careening down the highway... Kids, do not try this at home.] Izumi: Ack! What the hell are you doing! Kouji: Your last fare, that woman! Where did she get off? Taxi driver: Uhh... The insurance company building in front of the train station... (What the hell... my car!) Izumi: There! (59) [Izumi's mother is on the roof.] Izumi: Mom... Wh... why are you... You're too selfish! I have so many questions to ask you, so many things to tell you! What about Serika and Yuugo? Yuugo doesn't even remember what you look like! (60) Izumi's mother: I won't see them. I'm someone who died twelve years ago. Izumi: Then why did you give birth to us! If you didn't want us, you shouldn't have had us in the first place! You should have killed us all! _If you were going to abandon us, you should have been cruel to us from the start!_ (61) Kouji: Izumi... [He embraces him.] Kouji: It's enough. It's enough, don't speak anymore... Why are you the only one who has to suffer such misfortunes... Please don't cry... (62) How could you have been an unwanted child! //Izumi: Kou...// Kouji: I comprehend... I think, what you said before, and what you are about to do. I won't try to stop you. (63) But you have no right to wound him again! Izumi's mother: I beg you. He's suffered enough, gone through enough pain. I will have to leave Takuto with you... (64) [She smiles] I hope you won't make the same mistake I did. [She falls] (65) *scream* (66) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 5, chapter 3 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (67) Izumi: NO! WHY! Kouji: Don't go, Izumi! Don't look! Izumi: Let go of me! Bastard! (68) Kouji: Calm down! Izumi, calm... Izumi: Let go! Let me go! LET GO OF ME DAMMIT! Kouji: _I'm here!_ I'm here by your side, so please don't go... Izumi: I... _I don't need you!_ (69) [He claws at the wire fence] Izumi: I... don't... need you... I've had enough... I don't want anything... //Don't need...// Izumi: If I hope, I'm disappointed... If I believe, I'm betrayed! I don't want anything anymore! (70) //you...// Kouji: It's all right. Even if you can't love me... it's all right. (71) //As long as you say you don't want it, I... I won't tell you I love you again... I won't touch you... so...// Kouji: It doesn't even matter if you believe me or not. All I wish is that you'd let me stand by you... That's the only point on which I won't give. I don't ever want to be separated from you again... (72) I don't know how to leave you! I love you so much already, how would I be able to live apart from you...! Look at me, and remember this. I won't ever leave you! (73) Kouji: How could I fall in love with another man if I weren't serious about it... I'm not a pervert... [Weeell... La Traductrice will get herself a drink and refrain from commentary.] //I hope you won't make the same mistake I did...// Izumi: Idiot... //To let one's most precious thing be lost,// Izumi: You're such a moron. //To be afraid to love.// (74) Izumi: You're holding me so tight... //That's the only reason that's kept me alive.// Izumi: That you're hurting my back... It hurts... //Kept me alive...// //Takuto...// //Mother loves you.// //Now, let me return to his side...// (75) //To his side...// Serika: Really... so it _was_ that, then. Izumi: It was that...? Serika: Well, wasn't there a big commotion at the time? I knew immediately. I thought, maybe it's mom... Oh, drat... don't look so down, Takuto-oniichan! I'm not taking it to heart at all! She was strong, wasn't she, to stay alive all this time to say those words to you. If it were me, I wouldn't have been able to endure it. (It's heroic.) Well, I suppose she was a mother after all, she had _some_ sense of responsibility... (Maybe it was to be expected.) (76) [She turns, pulling an impish expression... though there are tears running down her cheeks.] Serika: Well, forget it, there's no point crying over spilt milk. I won't let it get me down at all! Izumi: Serika...! Serika: I'm not forcing myself. This is really what I feel. I'm happy enough already; it's happiness that Takuto-oniichan gave me. So you don't need to mention Mother... (77) Izumi: Serika... Serika: (OH, YEAH!) Takuto-niichan, what's with you and that girl? Are you still going out? Izumi: (Huh?) Uh... no. (She transferred.) Serika: You split up! That's great, I knew it would happen! They say obstacles always accompany true love, Takuto-oniichan, but you should watch out not to harm girls' hearts in the meantime. Izumi: (T...true love?) Serika: (Absolutely not allowed! I'm warning you!) I know you're popular with the girls, but doing that is unfair to your fans. [whispers] ...Did you do it with Nanjou-san yet? (How does it work anyway?) Izumi: WH... You little...! (I can't believe it! I brought you up to be decent!) Serika: (*laughs* Aw, it was a joke! *laughs* Oh, stop it!) (78) //Izumi: It's as if time stopped only for me, that day.// Serika: (Yuugo, over here! Class is over?) Yuugo: (I've been looking everywhere for you, sis!) //I don't know if Mom really only came to see me...// Izumi: (Let's go for a banquet!) Yuugo: (All right! I want beef ribs!) //After twelve years...// Serika: (Hey, I'm on a diet!) Yuugo: (Then stick to water!) Serika: (But I want to eat too!) (79) //There should come a day when the scar on my left hip heals...// Shibuya: Oh, right. I'm moving out. Izumi: Eh? Kouji: You're serious? (Lucky!) Shibuya: (You!) Look at you, you're ecstatic. (It's impolite.) I'm a student on the fast track, see, I got accepted by that university. (I was only taking the semester off, before.) I'm not like you two, my father has ambitions for me. (Inheritor of the Shibuya Hospital.) [Read: fixer-upper of his friends whenever they get cut up or run over...] *Ding-dong* Takasaka: (Nanjou, are you ready?) Izumi: But it's too sudden... Kouji: Don't ever come back again! (Spoil-sport!) Takasaka: (Nanjou, hurry up!) Shibuya [in the language of Shakespeare, plus universal gesture]: Fuck you! I wouldn't come back if you begged me on bended knee! Izumi: He swears... ;; (80) Shibuya: Besides, it looks as if I'm no longer needed. Izumi: But you can't! I'm moving out too, I've found a place already. Shibuya: What _are_ you talking about, Mr. Cleaning Lady? You would dare? The body count this summer isn't high enough for you yet? You don't know your own feelings, that much I can sympathize with. But that doesn't mean you should run from them. [In the car] Takasaka: (First up today, the live super idol music show, then three interviews and a photographic session.) Kouji: (He annoys me...) Shibuya: I don't think there'd be a problem. Besides, being scared doesn't do anyone any good. (81) The way I see it, I'm actually helping. //That's right... there's one issue that hasn't been resolved yet.// Kouji [singing]: I don't want to lose... (82) The truth that I face If this life isn't worth it I'll die without regret No hesitation Not a speck of compassion And no second thoughts. I'm not as kind as they say I am... //So I don't want to lose.// //The feeling moves me, deeply.// (83) *step* Izumi: You're late! Kouji: Ah... You're not asleep yet? Izumi. Mm. Want coffee? Kouji: Sure. Izumi: Are you going to get home this late every night? Kouji: Yeah... It's a matter of pride. I suppose I'm insecure, deep down. (84) Izumi: ... [Turns abruptly] What I want to say is... Kouji: Watch out! Izumi: Ack! (85) [He saves Izumi from the scalding coffee but... as my sister said, "How do they get into these situations?" Izumi's gut reaction was to ward Kouji away with his hands. Kouji sighs and lays his head on Izumi's shoulder.] Kouji: Please... Could you not be so wary... Izumi: Why? Why did you fall in love with me? Kouji: The reason? There are too many... I'm not even sure myself. You know, they talk about setting one's love on a pedestal, to adore from afar but not touch. I don't believe in that crap. Pretty turns of phrase only reveal childish feelings. (86) Kouji: To love someone with every breath... You want to touch, to hold, to kiss... To caress his soft hair, and... [pause] You really should push me away. As hard as you can. I'm not high on ethics. (87) Standing this close to the person I adore, I have a tendency to lose control... Hurry up and stop me... Izumi! Izumi: I... (88) I think that... maybe... I'll never be able to love anyone the way you love me, and I'm sure I won't have those feelings for you. But... //It feels as if// Izumi: I want to trust you. (89) //after all this time// Kouji: Do you think anyone will ever love you the way I do! //we've come full circle.// (90) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 5, chapter 4 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- //Everytime anything happens, the rain starts to fall endlessly, as if it had a starring role. The time I brought him home, the time we almost got run over protecting Serika. The time Kouji died. And, also, that night. (91) What's certain is, there's always blood...// [Took me the longest time to understand that. ^^;;; This is one adorable pic of Our Duo asleep in bed together. What I don't get is that nothing seems to have happened. Hullo?!] (92) Izumi: Uh... //The sound of rain...// //Izumi: It's cold. The air conditioner is turned up too high... But what's this? ...Oh yeah, I fell asleep without realizing it last night, and...// [He wakes up with a vengeance.] (93) Izumi: Why the hell are you in _my_ futon! (And undressed, too!) Kouji: Unn... [Izumi bashes him and stalks to the window.] Kouji [not with the pace of things yet]: ~~?? (Ow... Wh... what happened?) Izumi: Oh, it's raining. I hate rain. Kouji: (Head hurts...) Why? Izumi: Because I can't play soccer in the rain, it's obvious! Mo-ron. (94) [breakfast] Izumi: The nationals are coming up, and practice today is a lost cause. Kouji: Hey, you're free for the whole day then? Izumi: If the gym is empty, I'll go do some exercises there. [Ozaki note: summer vacation.] Kouji: I would have been free too, but I have to make up for lost days. Screw it, think I'll skip. Izumi: Why bother... aren't you the delinquent artiste? (You'll be expelled if you don't watch it.) Why do you go to school in the first place? Idiot. Kouji: Because you're there, of course. [Izumi stares.] (95) Kouji: Come to think of it, I don't want to be expelled as long as you're still there. (I gotta go.) I'm full. Izumi: Then... Why? Why do you do it? What do you hope to gain from me? Kouji [adjusting his glasses]: Your everything. (96) //Izumi: My everything...?// [Kouji in class] Student: (Ugh... why do we have to go through this torture even during vacation? It's boiling in here! I want to go for ice cream!) [Izumi putting his team through flexibility training] Izumi: (And hup one two...) Player: (It hurts!) Izumi: Huh? You mean... me? (97) Coach: That's right. If you get good results during the nationals and the games this coming winter, the association is thinking of sending you to Italy on a soccer scholarship. Izumi: Ita...ly? Coach: This is recognition, Izumi. Keep up the good work! You'll go a long way with your talent. Izumi: But I... Coach: This is a waiting period, so you just concentrate on soccer. Izumi: Uh... fine! //Coach: This is recognition!// //Coach: The association is thinking of sending you to Italy on a soccer scholarship.// //Coach: You just concentrate on soccer.// (98) Kouji: Italy? Izumi: Yes! Though it's not decided yet. I've had invitations to join all-star teams to go on the road, and from school teams and stuff, but I've never been this excited. It makes me feel that I really do have some ability, a good shot in the arm. I haven't felt like this for a long time. So... even though a lot of things happened because you showed up, this isn't a bad end to it... all.... (99) [Kouji kisses him.] (100) Kouji: You're not resisting? I won't answer for the result if you indulge me. For all you know, it's because I see your weaknesses that I'm kinder to you, on purpose. ...Did you expect congratulations from me? (101) Izumi: You're not happy for me? Kouji: You want me to be happy that you're leaving? I won't! Did you think that I can be happy knowing you're happy, even though we have to be apart? Do you mean we're soulmates no matter what distance separates us? What guarantee is there of that? Faith? Don't make me laugh! (102) [Well, it worked for Esca and FY... but never mind. Kouji has Izumi on his back on the linoleum in a second.] Kouji: Your mom was spouting idealism, but she was right. Unfortunately, there's one thing that really is impossible: two people cannot become one. //If you really love, there are no impossibilities. If you can't attain that, then how can you call it true love?// Kouji: That's why you can never understand everything about the other. No matter how much they might trust and love, two people must remain separate entities both in body and in soul. (103) Why don't you say something? //I didn't fall in love expecting you to requite me.// Kouji: Say something... //But the desire to possess has eaten its way into my very cells, indestructable. I want...// Kouji: I'm going to take you... //"your everything"// (104) Izumi: Take, then... //But I know I can't possess all of you, ever.// Kouji: Is this... pity? //What's more...// (105) //I'll probably never be happy.// Izumi: Pity...? It's not pity... but it's not... love. It's just that... I don't see any other way. I don't want to lie to you.. Kouji: You can't give your heart, so you offer your body instead? You're too much... innocent to the point of cruelty. (106) [There's some... shifting around... at this point. Take a deep breath folks and remember: mainstream shoujo mag] Izumi: Mnn... Kouji: You'll regret it. I don't think you know what I'm going to do to you. [He probably doesn't, at that. Don't they get Sex.Ed. in these schools?] Kouji: I won't let you go halfway through like last time. Izumi: You... you're selfish. And brutal... (107) Kouji: Touché. I've already passed the point of no return... Izumi: Un... //You'll never really know what the other is thinking.// //The extremity of passion covers the loved one with wounds.// //So I feed like a beast, calling curses upon myself...// Izumi: Un... ah! (108) Kouji: No, don't claw at the floor. //If things have to be like this, why fall in love at all?// Kouji: You'll hurt yourself... //Izumi: I grew little by little to need him... without knowing it.// //Kouji: I know you don't feel this way about me... So why do you allow this to happen?// //Izumi: I don't even understand why, in my heart of hearts.// (109) Izumi: Ah...! St...stop! //Heat!// Izumi: Unh... //My scar...// Kouji: I won't let go, I don't want to. Izumi: Kou...ji! Kouji: I won't, that's all. //It hurts!// Kouji: I want to lock you up where no one else will ever see you...! (110) Izumi: Fuck... Ah... //My wound...!// Kouji: I don't care, compassion or not, it doesn't matter... [He's really going at it now, far's I can tell... It's really too late at night for me to be doing this...] Izumi [clutching the leg of the nearest desk]: Uh... Ah! (111) //My wound...// //Nothing is forever; even what you believe to be true might not come to pass.// //Is reopening...// (112) //At the time, all I was certain of was the heat rising in my body where he touched me, and the pain of his grip on my wrist.// Izumi: I'm... dying... (113) //"Apart from that, nothing else"// (114) (115) ENDLESS END