This translation was last located at: http://members.nbci.com/elekdaisy/ZB/zbmain.html Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4: chapter 1 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters Do try to remember these, will you? Minami Ozaki has a maddening way of splitting up her voice-over boxes, and your version of Zetsuai doesn't support pagination. -------------------------- Bon, v'là que ça commence les notes de la traductrice: a word on the title of the series. I see it translated as "Desperate Love" absolutely everywhere. At one point, however, I realized that if you'd just given me the two characters I would have rendered the meaning "Incomparable Love." ^_^ The "zetsu" means "end," with connotations of death but also pinnacle, perfection. "Beyond me there is nothing." I figure the subtlety is intentional. -------------------------- Summary of previous: "Idol singer Nanjo Kouji searches constantly for a 'girl' with penetrating eyes that he glimpsed once when he was in the fifth grade. Eventually he discovers that the 'girl' is a young man his own age, the soccer player Izumi Takuto. [If you want to know what happened, it turns out that Izumi's sister Serika played soccer with him when they were little and tended to be mistaken for each other...;;] "Izumi has a tragic past -- his mother killed his father -- but Kouji, far from minding, continues to be strongly attracted by him. Izumi, however, has developed an aggressive attitude toward others as a result of his past and distances himself from Kouji for the same reason. "Izumi made the mistake of assuming that Kouji was in love with Izumi's younger sister Serika, Kouji's diehard fan. When Kouji realized this, he told Izumi he was the one he really liked. [True to form, Izumi fails to be clued in by this.] He also transfers into Izumi's school to be near him. [Though not, apparently, in the same grade -- K. is such a delinquent.]" -------------------------- (p1) Real-estate guy: Oh, you have a dog? This apartment would be impossible, then. But they allow pets in some of the newer high-rises. Izumi: Sixty-five thou... ;; REG: The price is reasonable, considering how real estate's been going up in this neighborhood. The restrictions on animals too (though people do keep them on the sly...) Oh, right, and you're a high school student, aren't you? Do you have your parents' permission to live alone? Izumi: Uh... REG: Without a signature from your guardian, proof of citizenship and sponsor, no place is going to accept you. (2) Izumi: //This is the fifth place already... I'll just have to try somewhere else...// (3) [The sign on the wall says Izumi Gakuen; it appears to be the orphanage where I. spent his formative years.] Secretary-looking lady: Are you looking for the principal? He's not here. Izumi: Well then... I was wondering, could I leave the dog here again? I bought a lock, and I'll pay for the food too. SLL: It's quite all right... um... Izumi: Is there a problem? SLL: Oh, no -- not about the dog, anyway. That is... Izumi: Did something happen? (4) SLL: Our school... might close down soon. Serika: Takuto-niichan! (What's with all the baggage?) Foster-mom: Oh, Takuto, you came... *Doggie barks* AHHH! *sound of running* Izumi: What happened? (Nerves.) Serika: Mom's scared of dogs. (Says she was bitten when she was little.) Izumi [sighing]: Oh. Can you step out for a moment, Serika?... [Ozaki skips el boring explanation] (5) Serika:...Nanjo-san is in love with someone? Izumi: That's what he said himself, so I'm advising you to give up. Serika: (Oh...) But I knew that. Izumi: HUH? ;; But... didn't you say you liked him? Serika: 'Course I like him, I'm a big fan of his! The first time I heard Nanjo-san's songs, I felt it -- "he already has someone of importance in his life." He always makes me feel as if he were singing for that one person. (6) Serika: I'm grateful to Nanjo-san. Even though the whole situation was blown up beyond what it deserved, I think it's good that it finally came out. [Referring to the "Is-Nanjo-dating-a-girl-whose-parents-committed-murder-suicide" media debacle...] (Hee... even though I got some grief for it.) Besides, I've still got good friends. There are a lot of people who won't mind that sort of thing. None of it makes me happier than Takuto-niichan being able to express himself fully on the soccer field. And also... //Izumi: Speaking like this...// Serika: ...It makes me happy that Nanjo-san loves a great person. Right? (7) //Izumi: ...it almost sounds as if _I_ were that person... Though he did say those things yesterday (a wonder he wasn't embarrassed). "I like you. I truly... respect you." I don't even think _he_ understands why he said that. The reason can't be the same.// //I don't want to make them worry or give them trouble.// Serika: You're leaving? But then why did you come? //I don't want to ask for Kouji's help either. But...// Izumi: Kouji, let's run for a while... [And yes, the dog is named Kouji. They have the same personality. DON'T get me started.] //...his eyes were serious.// (8) //Our school might disappear soon.// (flshbk) //Izumi: But why...!// //Because the financial situation is very edgy... maybe we'll be absorbed by the new [orphanage?] they're building. The children might be separated.// //Izumi: how could this happen...// [Izumi is waved off by yet another non-prospective landlord. The sign on the window reads, among other things, "18 and over."] (flshbk) //Izumi: I'll get more money! You can't let this place close down!// (9) //Izumi: Everyone, I'm sorry. I didn't keep my promise. But I'll be sure to win next time!// //If the school closes down, I'd have no place to go back to --// (10) Izumi: Damn my luck -- I'm soaked! [wipes rain from face] We really ran a long way, didn't we? *sigh* [keels over] Man, I feel like playing soccer... (11) //Twelve years ago, I already knew what it was to be world-weary.// Izumi: Hey, that tickles! (Will you not jump on top of people?) Are you trying to cheer me up? //Since I no longer trust anyone, life by myself has become a lot easier.// Izumi: Ack, Kouji! (You're drooling all over me.) Kouji, dammit! //By myself...// (12) [Izumi puts on (presumably) Human!Kouji's tape. Canine!Kouji barks.] Izumi: You recognize his voice? Actually, that's not surprising. I brought you in from the street at the same time as him, after all. //It was a rainy day too. That Kouji and this Kouji, dripping wet, huddled in a trash heap -- you just wanted to pick them up and take them home. They looked so lonely.// Izumi: I guess... I don't have the heart to throw you out... (13) Izumi: God, I'm hungry! I'm going to buy food; you watch the bags. (Okay?) Canine!Kouji: Woof! //They looked just like me... The difference is, I can go on by myself. I'm not a helpless puppy nor a feverish vagabond. I can continue living.// Izumi [at shop]: One red-bean-paste bun, one donut and a pastry with green onions. [The boy has taste.] Random ladies on street: Hey, stop! That dog's in awful danger! Don't cross the street! Don't -- (14) //I can continue living...// Random ladies: *scream* (15) Shopkeeper [very much in background]: That will be 560 yen *ka-ching* [Izumi stares in shock as his dog becomes Yet Another Statistic.] Izumi: Kou... //Blood is black; I know that from when I was little.// Izumi: KOUJI!! [Since Ozaki-san kindly spelled it out in katakana I'm assured that the vowel is long. But you're not interested in that. ^^ Change of scene: Kouji no apaato.] (16) Takasaka: WHAT DID YOU SAY! Kouji: ... [calmly unplugs his ears] Takasaka: You want me to reduce your workload so you can join the _soccer team?_ Did you honestly think I would accept such an idiotic proposal? Shibuya [rolling eyes]: I _knew_ this would happen. Takasaka: How can you be so calm!? (Argh -- my blood pressure!) I'm having enough trouble with the schedule just so you can go to school! This is the absolute best I can do! Shibuya: I suppose if this doesn't go through, you'll retire? Takasaka: Re... (17) Shibuya: Cough up a cool two mil for breach of contract, can you? Go over the details one more time for me, Kouji. Or are you just going to run off and hide -- with _him?_ When push comes to shove, how you think you're going to play soccer with those eyes of yours -- [The door opens] Who's there? Kouji: Oh -- Izumi...! (18) Izumi [who looks like the cat dragged him in]: Ah... Kouji: What's wrong? You're all wet! [This dialogue looks awfully familiar... ^^] Did something happen? //Kouji: Blood...!?// Shibuya: Izumi...? (Oy. Soaked to the skin.) Takasaka [who's always the absolute last one to clue in]: What's going on? [A delayed note here in case you're confused: Takasaka's the one with spectacles. Shibuya's the cute one. They're Kouji's manager and record company's prez's nephew -- respectively. Shibuya's also the nearest thing he's got to a friend, not to mention comic relief, mother hen and resident voice of reason.] (19) Kouji: Are you hurt anywhere? //What _did_ happen?// You'll be chilled. We'll talk later -- go take a shower, now, hurry! Shibuya: What the hell's up with him? (Hope this doesn't get out of hand...) Kouji: Will you excuse us for a while? [Izumi showers. Kouji paces.] (20) Kouji: How slow... //Unless... He's collapsed?// Izumi! [Kouji busts in the door and gets a nice scenic view. Um... I guess he was just slow, then. ^^;] Kouji: Ack -- I'm sorry! //Ack, ack, ack!// I thought maybe you'd fainted... (21) Izumi [dully]: Kouji's dead... Kouji: Oh... Izumi: Run over by a car... Kouji: Car...!? What about you, are you hurt? [He grabs Izumi by the shoulders. Izumi lets his glance slide away.] Izumi: ...No. (22) Kouji (exhaling): That's great... as long as you're all right... Izumi: That time... you got hit by a car, if you'd been a step slower, you'd have died too. I thought of that and... came here without realizing... I'm tired. (23) I've seen enough death... (24) Kouji [tearing up and glomping Izumi]: Don't cry! (25) //Because he looked...// [Izumi's eyes widen, then close. He returns the embrace.] Izumi: Idiot... you're the one who's crying. //...just like me.// -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 2 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (27) [Ticking of clock says 11:25.] Shibuya: Is he asleep? Kouji: He's asleep. I gave him something so he won't wake up till morning. (28) Shibuya: ...So, what are you gonna do? Kouji: I can't exactly ditch him. Shibuya: I _figured_ that it would turn out like this, ever since the first time you met Izumi. We might as well take this opportunity to hash things out, Kouji. (29) Shibuya: What you're doing now is wrong. Got bored with laying women, so you try the other side? (Though it's partly my fault for encouraging you at first.) What happens when other people find out? You and Izumi'd be labeled for the rest of your life. You can't exactly go out there and say you chase guys on occasion too. All you'll get is curiosity, contempt, mockery for your trouble: "Nanjo Kouji's gay --" (30) Kouji: That's not it! Shibuya: Try another, I've heard that one before. That look in your eyes is infatuation, Kouji. It's not normal. Kouji (collaring him): One more word and I kill you! Shibuya (calmly): The writing's on the wall, Kouji. Izumi Takuto is a man and you'll never be happy together. Will you wake up and smell the coffee! (31) Kouji: What right or wrong is there in loving someone! If I love a woman it's right, but if I love a man it's wrong -- is that what you're trying to say? If it's not accepted by society, then it's automatically wrong? WHAT KIND OF LOVE OBEYS THAT! (32) These are _my_ feelings and no one has the right to meddle with them. Get out... No one's going to get in my way... Shibuya: I'm going. (Taka-chan's waiting for me.) Mostly because I don't feel like getting beaten to a pulp. Just remember -- this love of yours will shatter, sooner or later, and I don't know whether the two of you will be able to take it. (33) Shibuya: I must say, though, I never thought I'd hear those words from you -- Kouji. I rather admire you for it. [The door closes, leaving Kouji alone.] (34) (flshbk) Shibuya: Ahh... I think I understand the attraction now. Kouji: Huh? Shibuya: The ineffable leader's charisma. That fellow makes one feel as if he stood apart from the common herd. I want to bring it out! I'm very confident of my judgment. Kouji: What confidence... //I know it too. But I can't say it. This love is forbidden.// (35) //But what can I do otherwise? My heartbeat's speeding up by the second... my passion will last centuries... my pain...// [Kouji's leaning over the sleeping Izumi by this time.] //I know. As long as I don't say anything... as long as I don't do anything. As long as I don't disgust him... as long as I don't defile him. As long as the hard-won sense of trust isn't lost...// (36) //Don't let him... lose...// (37) [He cops a feel on Izumi... I'm starting to think it was Rohypnol. ^^] (38) Kouji: I love you, Izumi... I love you... How I love you... //I'm going to explode!// (39) [He restrains himself AFAIK though, at some point leaving the bedroom and passing out in the living room amidst the detritus of liquor.] Izumi: ..ji. Kouji. KOUJI!! Kouji: Hnn... Izumi: You're finally awake! I thought you'd died of alcohol poisoning! (40) Kouji: WAHH! I didn't do anything, I swear! It was just a momentary temptation... Izumi: Huh? Kouji: Um... (nothing.) ;; [Yar. Nice recovery. Here's where we find out Izumi cooks.] Kouji: This... this is... (There was nothing in the fridge but booze.) Izumi: How do you manage to _live?_ (Eat it, all of it.) Kouji: Wow, this is amazing! Izumi: I made you bento too. You can't eat out all the time. Call it an apology for last night. I'm really sorry for what happened, barging in and co-opting your bed... Kouji: (feels somewhat guilty) (41) //Like an angry frown, but with shyness in it, and worry --// Kouji: After school, do you want to go bring flowers as an offering? Izumi: Yeah... //That's his special expression that I remember.// [Kouji smiles... he has an idea.] //Izumi: You want me to be your housekeeper?// //Kouji: You haven't decided on a place to stay, right?// //Izumi: Well, no...// Kouji: In exchange for room and board, what do you say? (Because you won't stay if I refuse to take your money -- but when it comes down to it, we paid our housekeeper thirteen grand a month.) Izumi: (You come from a wealthy family?) (42) //Kouji: If you really think about it, maybe I'm happy right now!// [Math class. The teach is doing sine-cosine transforms. Kouji's off in lala-land. Collapsed-at-desk piccies-wise, this frame ranks up there with the Slam Dunk one of Rukawa fast asleep and drooling.] //Kouji: Right... yesterday, in the midst of the uproar, I got to see him in the shower... He's covered up usually, you don't realize how beautiful he is. Bronze flesh wet with droplets of water, the sight roots you to the ground... really... so gorgeous... so _sexy_...// (43) Girl at the next desk: Aaah, sensei! Nanjo-kun has a nosebleed! //Kouji: No way! How _embarrassing!_// Everyone: EH ---?! [The incident is the talk of the school ^^] Shibuya: Yo, Nosebleed Boy! Kouji: You little -- Shibuya: Heh, this takes the cake. (Thought I'd die laughing.) Nanjo "Tabloid Cover" Kouji -- Mr. Playboy himself -- gets a nosebleed in class! Sprayed, from what I heard! Passing girls: (How icky...) (44) Kouji: Oy, Izumi-sempai! (God, you're annoying, Shibuya!) Izumi (seriously): It's not something I cooked, is it? Or is it one of those sexual frustration things? Shibuya [busting a gut]: BWAHAHAHAHA!! Soccer-team manager: Izumi-kun? That's funny -- there's a meeting today, didn't they get in touch with you? Izumi: Huh? No, I didn't know. STM: Darn it, I told them to bring you the message -- hurry, it's going to start soon. Izumi: (All right, you don't have to push, you know --) STM: (Whatever, just get going!) [She's just like Ayako from SD, I swear. Why are all team managers girls in anime? Common practice in Japanese schools? Who was it in Tsubasa, one wonders...?] (45) Kouji: ......! //Wh... what is this? How could I be shivering...// Shibuya: Uh -- Nanjo-kun? (What a troublemaker.) Could you glare after that girl with a somewhat less overt display of jealousy? Just a tad? //Kouji: Jealousy... I'm jealous?// *Sound of car horn* Shibuya: Kouji -- someone's here to pick you up. (46) A Ferrari F-40 no less! (Nuts -- two million yen. Some sort of industrialist?) La Minamoto Michiko: *sigh* *seductive laugh* Well, you called, so I came! (flshbk) //Shibuya: I called her, Kouji, so go. Don't tell me you can't get it up for anyone but _him._// Michiko: Try for a slightly happier expression, can't you? It's the Ferrari I promised you. [I won't make any comments. I _swear_ I won't make any comments...] //Kouji: The illness has sunk in too deep.// (47) //There's nothing worse than this. Molesting him in his sleep, nosebleeds, and now jealousy.// Michiko: *laughs again* What is it? Silly child. //And as if that weren't enough, I find myself wishing the woman in my bed were Izumi...// Michiko (looking out window): That's funny... that boy's still there. He was there before too; I wonder what he wants. Kouji: Oh! Michiko (as he pushes her out of the way): Hey! (48) //Kouji: Izumi!// Michiko: Kouji? What's wrong? Why jump all of a sudden like that? Kouji: Please leave. I won't see you again. [At her understandably surprised look] How wonderful it would be, if hearts could be bought for two million yen. (49) Michiko: Kou... [Kouji rushes outside.] Izumi: ...Shibuya said you had a woman over, so I was waiting here. (50) Kouji: You... you've got to believe me, there's absolutely nothing between us... Izumi: You don't need to excuse yourself to me. It's not as if I'm your girlfriend. Kouji: Oh... well, yes, come to think of it, that's right... Izumi: That meeting just now... it was decided that I would be the team captain, starting next year. [Japanese school year taken into account, it's not very long from this point.] So I was thinking of quitting one of my part-time jobs to concentrate on soccer. Kouji: ...! (51) Izumi: I don't want to lose badly like that again! So if you were serious about hiring me, I will have to trouble you. Kouji: But... but of course! The pleasure's all mine! It is! Izumi (steady stare): ...... Kouji: *doki* Izumi: Is there something wrong with your eyes? Kouji: Huh? Izumi: Didn't Shibuya say that last night? Something along the lines of, how could you play soccer with eyes like yours... Kouji: You heard? Izumi: ...Yeah. Kouji: That's right. I had an accident during a karate competition two years ago, and my right eye was hit. (52) Since then that eye has deteriorated to the point of not being able to see much, without contact lenses or glasses. On the other hand, the vision in my left eye is abnormally good. Izumi: (Oh...) Kouji: I wasn't being facetious, though. //What clear eyes -- almost as if they were able to penetrate to the depths of my depraved desires.// Kouji: I really think it would be a wonderful thing to be able to play soccer with you. Please believe me. //I'm afraid to look him in the face...// Izumi: In other words, you were reacting to my goal shots with that kind of vision? Kouji: (They were okay.) Yeah... by instinct. Izumi: Wow. (53) If nothing had happened to your eyes, you could have been the number one goaltender in Japan! I would stake on it! //Kouji: *dokun dokun* Wah... I can't take it anymore! I want to hold him!// (54) [And he does. ^^ Not one for delayed gratification, our boy.] Izumi: You... you! Could at least pay attention to person and place... You're breaking my ribs! (You idiot you!) I'm gonna kick! You... (55) [Kouji shuts him up effectively, as a fanfic might have had it.] Izumi: ......!! Michiko: Kouji...!! [Janet! Rocky!... Sorry. ;;] (56) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 3 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (57) //The shadow of Izumi that appears in my dreams is like an edged blade that cuts deep at the slightest touch, tempting me. And I like a wild beast in rut, clutch Izumi to me tightly, covering myself with blood. Black hair, slender arms and legs, that smooth, golden brown skin... Spare build, slim waist, not a place I don't debauch. By the time I wake, I'm mired in self-disgust.// (58) Izumi: TIME TO GET UP -- Kouji: Puh-lease... Could you be a little more gentle... (I've got low blood pressure...) //But once awakened...// Izumi [full-blown hausfrau mode]: What are you talking about? Buck up and be a man! If you don't get up, you don't get breakfast! //...the distance between dreams and reality immediately reasserts itself.// Kouji: Well then... (59) Izumi: Wah! Kouji: Kiss me good morning. [Izumi decks him with the frying pan, à la Akane.] Kouji [weakly]: I... I'm getting up... This face is the moneymaker of the household, you realize... (Hurts!) Izumi: (And you! You get up too!) Shibuya: (Have mercy -- spare me!) [Note (Ozaki's for once): Shibuya's sponging off Kouji again.] (60) //Obviously, after the forced kiss, he kicked me with no compunction whatsoever... (maybe because I slipped him the tongue.)// (flshbk) Izumi: Once I let pass, but you do it again! That was _just_ my first kiss! (Damn you -- bastard!) *sounds of fighting* Kouji: (But I'm apologizing!) Izumi: (Shut up, hentai! Do you jump men and women indiscriminately or something?) Kouji: (It was a momentary impulse --) Izumi: (Do I look like the "momentary impulse" type to you?) //He's entirely too naive, and dismisses me as "just a weirdo." So I take advantage of it to do some "weird" things. (Pretty useful cover!)// //Kouji: Actually, if that _was_ his first kiss, then I lucked out. Though it's not really surprising... (What a late bloomer.)// Izumi: What the hell is that evil smile? (Can't take it no more.) Shibuya: Hee... four chances out of five he's thinking perverted thoughts, right? (That boy!) (61) //Kouji: Such an innocent... must never have had an impure thought in his life...// [It's that David Hamilton virgin-Lolita appeal -- except Izumi's a guy. But since he's changing, let's take a moment out with Kouji to appreciate. :P---] Izumi: What? Will you stop staring like that? //That a man could really fall in love with another man...// Shibuya [à la Chippendales]: (Doh -- you made him mad again.) Why don't you stare at my naked bod? Kouji: Who the hell wants to look at you! Shibuya: Dear me! So how come you gaze at Izumi with unabashed desire then? How icky! Kouji: Do you have a problem with that? Shibuya [girly]: Wah, how gross! Get away with you! Izumi: SHUT UP! [Note on untranslatabilities: It took a Minami Ozaki freetalk for me to be sure of this, but Shibuya does have this habit of using girl-talk from time to time. MO says he's not okama or anything, it's just a quirk he's practiced and is proud of (like Chris Alladin's Pikachu imitation, say). This is the sort of thing that renders rather badly in Chinese, and not at all in English.] (62) //...who's never had an impure thought in his life...// Kouji: It was just a joke. Don't take things so seriously. //Those words, "I love you"... I've already violated you several times in my dreams, do you know that...// (63) Kouji: That's great, OK! Director: Good work, everyone! (Good work!) Takasaka: Good... Nanjo, where are you going? Kouji [whipping past at high velocity]: Home, of course. Takasaka: We still have to discuss the new single. Kouji: You don't need me for that sort of minor detail. Takasaka: And the TV show that keeps on trying to cast you... Kouji: I refuse. Takasaka: Their leading lady's refusing to act if you don't take the role opposite her. Kouji: That's none of my business. (64) Tell her that I won't play along with a woman's whims. Takasaka: But Nanjo, how can I -- Michiko [appearing at the door]: Are you afraid of losing quality time with that young man? (65) Kouji: I told you I won't see you again. No matter how you annoy me, I won't do your show. Michiko: Really... I saw it, you know. When you kissed that boy... [pause] Your expression doesn't change at all. That's what I like, that poker face of yours. Kouji: Is this a mistake? It interests me that you would make such a joke. Michiko: Do you think the media will care if you were joking? Kouji: ... If you dare... (66) Kouji: If you dare do anything to him, I'll rip that pretty face of yours to shreds. Michiko: ...!! //I won't forgive anyone who tries to hurt him. I'd defy the world to protect him. I'd destroy anyone who dares to interfere!// (67) //No one can take him from my side!// *sound of whistle* Izumi: Assemble! [Everyone's dead on their feet] And quick! Do you want ten more laps around the field? Player 1: Hey, Izumi, practice's a bit too harsh... the first years have all collapsed. Izumi: That's my training regime! We don't need people who treat soccer as entertainment. If you're not down with it, don't play! [The other players shut up. Oy. I didn't know about MO's Tsubasa dj at this point, but you can tell she's paid attention to her sports mangas. I was rubbing at my temples trying to make the Slam Dunk flashbacks go away.] (68) [Kouji stands on the sidelines, watching the players straggle off the field.] Players: God, I feel nauseous. (Ow... I'm _so_ tired... I can't take another step... Can't take this anymore!) Player 1: Of course I admit that Izumi-sempai is strong. But this is like a one-man team. Player 2: He's incredible during competition, sure... Player 1: You can fall into a trance watching him. Player 2: His talent's God-given (like that animal energy), but you get the feeling that he doesn't trust the rest of the team at all. Player 1: That's right. Player 2: (Isn't it? But I still respect him a lot.) //The feeling that he doesn't trust the rest of the team at all...// (69) Izumi: You don't need to come to all my individual practices. You're not ditching work, are you? Kouji: Don't worry, I like it this way. I'll accompany you every day. Izumi: As you like! A couple of players [suddenly appearing]: Izumi... sorry, but we're quitting. We can't keep up with your training. We didn't join the club to become soccer superstars, and we're tired of the emphasis on winning anyway. (70) Izumi: As you like! Players: Is that all you can say? The real problem is that arrogant attitude of yours! No one will follow you willingly! Izumi: Winning is everything in this world. Strength is everything -- nothing else is worthy of belief. Someone who's weak but willing to make an effort earns my respect. The rest are useless. (71) [Kouji looks more shocked than the players on the receiving end of this diatribe.] //At the time, I felt an indecipherable tenderness pass through his eyes.// Izumi: If you're not satisfied, you can try to surpass me. //I'm happy to be praised by the one I love, of course; it may be the first time he's treated kindly someone from the outside world.// [*quashing the SD flashbacks* This passaggio took a bit of interpreting for me. IMHO Kouji's contrasting Izumi's "number one goaltender" remark with the way -- he now realizes -- I. treats everyone else on his team.] (flshbk) // He's so incredible during competition, sure, you can fall into a trance watching him.// (72) //But at the same time --// *glug glug glug* Izumi: Ack, that's too much! (I tell you I don't drink!) Kouji: Come on, don't be such a square. It's not often I get a night off, so the least you can do is have a drink with me. [Ozaki's note: And Mr. Three's-A-Crowd isn't around either. (Shibuya: What -- I'm on a date!)] Izumi: You're hopeless. //The desire to possess was almost asphyxiatingly strong.// [Vintage Ozaki -- like her dj's _called_ "doukusenyoku". It's a funny sort of thing to say, very seme-ish.] Kouji: Hey, Izumi-sempai, can I ask you a question? Do you have any experience with women? Izumi: Wi -- [slams his glass down] Asshole! Are you underestimating me? Kouji: (Huh?) N...no! How could I possibly... (You're drunk...!) (73) Izumi: *hiccup* Girls have told me they liked me, too! Several times! [Ozaki note: he talks too much when he's drunk.] Kouji: That... *gulp* That's what I thought. //For a moment there, I thought I was going to go mad with jealousy.// Izumi: But since I'm always preoccupied with soccer and other things, I've got no spare time to think about girls. (How come it's so hot all of a sudden?) So it would be rather pathetic to date someone -- for the girl, I mean... Besides, I'd always like soccer better... (74) All right then! Let's go play soccer! Kouji: Wah! (The non sequiturs of a drunk man!) [But this is K. and I. we're talking about, so they go play soccer.] Izumi: Hey! Block it! Block it, you ass! Kouji: How do you want me to block anything? (It's pitch dark!) Izumi: If you don't block it this time, I'm not feeding you tomorrow! Kouji: That is _so_ unreasonable -- ! (75) [Izumi drives one in.] Izumi: I'm not... feeding you... (Why is the ground spinning...) Kouji: Watch out -- (76) Kouji: Phew! Could you please not scare me like that? Izumi: Ahahahaha! Nice catch! (You should catch the ball the same way!) Kouji: No good, he's totally wasted. (Though that's a given. Never thought he was so bad at holding his liquor...) Izumi: ...Funny how... every time I turn around you seem to be next to me... I've... never met... anyone as weird as you... //Kouji: ...! I can't!// (77) (flshbk) //"...The feeling that he doesn't trust the rest of the team at all."// //"That's right."// Kouji: I... I won't leave your side. Even if you say you hate me, I won't leave you. Izumi: Nn...ah? //I can't stop!// Kouji: You don't need to trust anyone else, as long as you trust me. All I need is you. I... can't anymore. I really like you. (78) I don't want you to hate me... What should I do... I love you, I love you, I can't stop myself! (79)(80) Kouji: I want to make love to you... [Note on untranslatabilities, mark II: There _is_ a difference between "suki da yo" and "aishiteru," even when used under similar circumstances, which exists in Chinese / Japanese but not in English. Drives me nuts. Also, the actual Chinese text reads "I want to hold you," but going by fanfic usage (my only experience), this is an euphemism. Certainly Izumi reacts to it that way -- I mean, Kouji's already _holding_ him, isn't he?] (81) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 4 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (82) //Izumi: Wh...what? What did he say? Just now, what did that... what did he say?// (83) //Dizzyness// Kouji [on phone]: Hi, is that the manager? It's me. I agree to that TV series you mentioned before. (84) Also, I would like to be the one to write the next single. ...Yes. And you can tell the producers I'll cooperate with any amount of work, so the company should definitely continue to protect my privacy. That's right. I have to be free from 3 to 7 PM, that's my only condition. (85) Izumi: *pounding headache* ~ ~ ~ ~ Kouji: Here, take this. Are you all right? (One glass and he's out for the night.) Izumi: Uh-- Kouji: I'm very sorry, I didn't know you were so intolerant... are you going to throw up? (86) Izumi: No... It's a minor thing; it'll go away as soon as I start kicking a ball around. //Before... was I dreaming...// Kouji: I was going to try to cook, but I grew up in the sort of family where males didn't set foot in the kitchen. So if you want anything, I'll go buy it for you. //God, my head hurts, I can't think...// Izumi: Um... about last night... Kouji: Oh, _yes._ I'll be somewhat busier from now on, so don't wait dinner for me in the evenings. Just make something for yourself and go to bed. [You can almost see the halo at this point] ...Last night? Is there a problem? (87) *sound of door closing* Izumi: That... that's right. Yeah. Argh -- I'm such a moron! Why the hell did I have a dream like that? (I can't stand it! I'm never drinking again!) //No mistake, it's got to be a dream! No matter how weird that fellow is, he would never say anything like that.// Izumi: The joke's getting a little out of hand... (88) //What the hell... "I want to make love to you..."// Izumi: (Ahh -- it hurts!) (89) Shibuya: Don't you find that Nanjo-sama has been conspicuous by his absence lately? Is he still alive? Izumi: Huh? But aren't you always with him? (He came to school today too.) Shibuya: Yeah? I totally did not see him. (I even talked to your classmate.) And he's been missing breakfast and dinner a lot too. Izumi: I think he's busy with some sort of television gig. (But still, he's always around.) Shibuya: Hmm -- in other words, to encounter Nanjo-sama, all one has to do is stick to you? Izumi: ...... (90) //That's right. Even though he said he was going to be busy, and that we won't see him mornings or nights, he's still at my side every time I think to look around... smiling at me. So I start taking him for granted, naturally, as if he were part of the air itself...// (flshbk) //Kouji: I want to make love to you...// Izumi [slamming his hands down on the counter]: Hey! Shibuya! Shibuya: Hai! (91) Izumi: Has that fellow... has Kouji always been like that? Shibuya: Um... like what? (Scared the crap out of me!) Izumi (complete non sequitur): Like... like hitting on men and women both. You know, lovey-dovey and kissing and stuff... Shibuya: WAHAHAHAHA! He topped you? Izumi: _No!_ Nothing like that! What I'm trying to say -- Shibuya: So it's like that! You're already at the kissing stage! I gotta hand it to him! (Hee hee hee -- I don't know if I should be in awe or what.) *table slapping sounds* Izumi: Will you listen to what I'm saying! Shibuya: Hey, have you been misinformed? (*chuckle* Too funny.) He's not homosexual or bisexual or anything. Izumi (seriously): What's the dif? Shibuya: ...;; If a man only loves men, that's homosexuality. If he loves both men and women, that's called bisexuality. [Ozaki note: Hey, who needs your explanations!] Kouji likes women, sure, but he's totally not into men. (And even women-wise, if the looks aren't there...) Izumi: So? (92) Shibuya: Slow on the uptake, aren't you? _So,_ don't you feel "special"? (And I do mean extra special.) Izumi [nonplussed]: But why? Shibuya: I haven't got the answer to that, go ask him in person. (Why am I telling you all this anyway...) But there's one thing I do know. Izumi: What? Shibuya: This question has grown beyond my interference. //Izumi: I'm... "special"?// (93) [C'est la rentrée scolaire!] Female student #1: I heard there was a lot of competition on the entrance exams to our school this year. FS #2: Girls, right? I heard there were three times as many. FS #1: (Urgh, really? Thank goodness I got in a year early.) FS #2: How come all of a sudden... FS #1: Stupid! Do you really have to ask? Look over there, there! The renowned duo of the school. You see, once the word got out... [And it's our boys, looking cool. Kouji did something non-regulation to his uniform -- it looks like rock-concert Armani. Or maybe it's just him.] (94) Izumi [little hearts bouncing everywhere]: ...Hey, don't you think we're attracting too much attention? Kouji: Really? [Ozaki note: He's used to it.] Izumi: Moron! It's all your fault! It's you! (Ack, don't glomp me, you idiot!) Kouji: Come on, don't be mean. Girls: *swoon* [And this seems to be due to the glomping. ^^ Hey, if I hadn't gone to a private Catholic all-girls...] Kouji: Aren't there just as many watching you? Izumi: Huh? Kouji [pointing at various hot and bothered boys]: Look there -- and there -- and that one. That-last-boy: (Wow, he's so cool...) (95) Izumi: But they're all guys... (Are you BS'ing me or what...) Kouji: I bet they're all new team members who came to this school because they admire you. Izumi: How would you know... Kouji: Anyone can see your brilliance, as long as they've seen you on the field -- no matter whether you make the playoffs or not. Everyone watches you. //Of course I know why they're all watching you.// Izumi: Hmph... //Because I'm the one who watches you most attentively. Because I'm the most attentive --// Izumi: Assemble! (96) Manager: Izumi, there's a lot of new members! //Izumi: Those few...// And-sure-enough-the-guys-K.-pointed-out: (We're definitely not quitting...) Izumi: I'm the captain of the soccer team, Izumi Takuto! In a moment we'll divide into red and white teams to play one another. Red will be me and the first years; white, the second and third years. Everyone: Whoa! (But we just started!) Girl #1: I think Izumi-sempai is so cute! (Even though he's rather intimidating.) Girl #2: There's a lot of girls who worship him in private, you know. Girl #1: (Oh, really?) Girl #2: I know a girl who confessed to him. Girl #1: (So what happened?) Girl #2: (Who knows? I guess it didn't work out.) (97) Girl #1: I wonder... does he have a girlfriend? Girl #2: (Oy, Minako, are you _serious?_) Player: Don't let the first years get the ball! Satou! Satou: All right! Izumi: First years! What are you doing just standing there! Catch up to them, quick! FY: H...hai! Izumi: Dammit -- is this any way to gain possession! Satou: Huh? (98) Izumi (smiling): You're pretty fast, boy. [But not quite as fast as me...] Satou: Ooh...ah... Player: Satou! What the flying frag are you doing! FY: Izumi-sempai! Shoot! [And he does. Kouji destroys a tree by way of stress relief.] (99) //There's a buzzing noise in my head.// [The sign over the door says "Studio Number Five."] Director: Cut, cut, cut! (100) Hmm -- Nanjo, that's not quite it. Can't you inject a bit more feeling into the words? You're playing a teenager in love with an older woman, so you should be a little more passionate than that. Exaggerate a little; let the naked desire show. Kouji [rather unenthusiastically]: Oh. Director: Let's take it again from scene 21. //I smell burning flesh, and it makes me nauseous.// Kouji: "I love you, don't leave me..." //Will these thoughts and this love remain unrealizable all my life?// Michiko: "It's selfish of you to say that. You gain nothing by coercing me like this." (101) //I want to gouge out the eyes of all the people who watch him.// Shibuya: Hey, Taka-chan. (Is shooting coming along?) Takasaka: Ah, Katsumi. Shibuya: So? Has he been well lately? Takasaka: Ah... he's been very diligent in his work -- a great load off my back -- but... //I want to tear to pieces all the people who touch him.// Michiko: "I'm not interested in this sort of over-heated passion; it irritates me." Takasaka: Sometimes he shuts down only to become manic afterwards. His emotions are unstable, and he doesn't look too great either. As if he's desperately trying to suppress something -- //This emotion that makes me feverish all over, will it never be allowed an outlet until I die?// Michiko: Hm? [I guess K. missed a line...] Kouji: What should I do, then? (102) Is it wrong of me to love you? But if that's so, why did I fall in love with you so deeply! TELL ME...! Michiko: Ah -- that hurts! Director: Cut... cut, cut! That was it! That was beautiful! (Even though it wasn't in the script.) Just that level of emotion, please. [There's no acting like method acting... Kouji just pants for a moment.] Director: Ten minute break! (103) //I beg you, don't smile at anyone but me --// Shibuya: What a physiognomy... you look like hell warmed over. And you're supposed to be an entertainer? Go check yourself out in the mirror. You've got the face of a demon. (104) //Almost a demon...// [Ticking of the clock says 3AM -- merely the time at which I'm translating this. ^^] Izumi: ...Kouji...? You back? Why are you sleeping here? You're gonna catch a cold... [as Kouji fails to respond] Hey. (105) //It doesn't matter if I look like hell.// Izumi: What's wrong with you? You... you're hurt! //Nothing matters.// Kouji: ...I'm fine. I was out on my motorbike and I had a spill -- all the fault of my eyes. Izumi: You look like that and you still insist you're fine? Hurry up and take off your jacket! (Let's see, the first aid kit...) Kouji: Ah... Don't turn on the light! _Don't turn it on!_ [Izumi pauses with his hand on the switch.] Kouji: Face like this... I don't want you to see... (106) //I'm like an imbecile...// Izumi [cleaning Kouji's arm]: I'm thinking... are you burning out? You aren't sleeping at all, why do you think I tell you not to force yourself to come to my practices? (What a deep scrape.) Kouji: ...Am I an annoyance? Don't you find me a bother? Izumi: That's not what I said. Kouji: I won't, that's all. I won't stop coming. Even if I have no time to sleep, I won't sacrifice the time I spend playing soccer with you. Izumi: What are you all worked up about this time around? (107) Kouji: Because that's the only thing that brings us together now! //I'm like an imbecile, frustrating myself endlessly, backing myself into a corner...// Kouji: I... never thought that I could be as weak as a girl. //I can't stop trembling!// Kouji: If my eyes aren't like this... if I'm not an entertainer... if I'd been playing soccer with you since we were small, would that be enough to win your trust? (108) //Everything up to now// Kouji: Do you know why I piled on the work all of a sudden? Because I'm afraid of being alone with you like this, just the two of us. //is over.// [For once, I think Izumi sees it coming -- and he looks shocked. Very shocked.] Kouji: Because I love you. (109) Kouji: I want you so much there's no way out... Body or soul... (110) I can't... take... any more... (111) [He grabs Izumi, who slaps him. Kouji doesn't back off, just gives him that... look... hoo boy.] Izumi: STOP... (102) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 5 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- [All right, no more pussyfooting... I hadn't realized I could be so chicken as to cringe from translating this chapter, yet that's what happened. Funny, ain't it?] (103) Izumi: ...! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! STOP IT! GET THE HELL AWAY --! (104) Kouji: What am I doing? Isn't it obvious -- I want to fuck you! [Okay, okay -- I plead that's what he would have said in English couldn't find a proper equivalent and Gawd knows what the original was anyway.] (105) Izumi: What...what sort of a joke is this! Bastard! I'm a guy! (106) Kouji: How could I not realize that... That's why I want to make an end of it here, with you...! Izumi: Let go of me, you asshole -- ow! (107) *flash of lightning -- rumble of thunder* Kouji: It's those eyes that lost me, that drove me mad... (108) Izumi: Mmnf! Mn... (109) //Make an end of it here with you!// [Izumi claws at the wound on Kouji's arm, drawing blood. A scuffle ensues.] (110) Izumi: ...!! Kouji: Did you forget? For good or for ill, I'm skillful. Why don't you just be nice... I don't want to hurt you. (111) Izumi: Don't underestimate me! [Kouji decks him decisively.] Izumi: Nn... (112) *more lightning and thunder* Izumi: Da...damn you... Stop it... Kouji: Now is still not too late... (113) If I go on loving you, I'll be unable to leave you for the rest of my life. These feelings are impossible to fulfill... you should hurry and prevent me! Izumi: What... what the hell are you talking about... _I don't understand!_ Kouji: I'll make you understand... Make you see how much I like you... and in what way... (114) Izumi [catching hold of the first aid box and throwing it]: Do you think that as long as you "love," you have the right to do anything! *breaking glass* Kouji: ...! (115) Nn... //Izumi: ...!! Protecting me!// Kouji: Quite the opposite, Izumi... If you continue to ignore me like this, I'll only come to love you more and more. For me to leave you... I would have to kill you first, and then die myself. (116) [He pulls a shard of glass out of his shoulder.] Kouji: As long as I live... I will find you no matter what, though you fly to the ends of the earth. So before that happens, I beg you to kill me. (117) *the glass falls to the floor and shatters* [Who says ukes don't put up a struggle... By the time Kouji's got Izumi properly trussed with the remains of his own shirt, they're both out of breath.] Kouji: Really... this isn't like coercing a woman at all. You'll be the death of me. Izumi: Nn... (118) [He fights back. Bites back, anyhow.] Kouji: Ch'! [He slams Izumi back onto the bed.] Kouji: How pitiful... To be treated this way, even though you never did anything wrong. (119) Say it. Tell me you don't ever want to see my face again. Tell me to go and die... Izumi: St -- stop it! What are you... DON'T LOOK! (120) //Kouji: A... SCAR!!// Izumi: Why... why do you have to say those things about death... killing... (flshbk) //Young!Izumi: It hurts... It hurts! Mother!// Izumi: I don't understand... (121) WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO SELF-CENTRED! [Kouji moves...] Izumi: Don't... don't touch my wound... (122) *drip of tears* Kouji: I can't do it... I can't do it! It's not that! (123) How could I be willing to do something like this... but if I don't hurt you now, you're sure to suffer greater torments in the future! It's only loving someone... Why... *sob* (124) [Whereupon he unties Izumi... Do I follow the logic? No. But when do I ever follow Kouji's logic?] Kouji: I'm sorry... Izumi: Ugh... (125) Dammit... _Damn it!_ (126) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 6 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (127) Shibuya: I'm ba-aack! It's Katsumi, just getting home in the morning! Wow, that was some downpour last night -- stormed so I was stranded in Roppongi and couldn't get back -- (that was a problem all right, forced to huddle with a girl in skintight clothing all the way till dawn...) I'm starving! Hurry up and make me something to... eat... Shibuya: Oy, oy -- how come everyone's still asleep... (128) [He gets his first good look at the trashed apartment.] Shibuya: What... What the hell happened _here!_ (Burglars?) (129) Shibuya: Hey, there's water all over the place! (What a mess...) You've got to be kidding me. There's no one here... (130) //Bloodstains --?// Shibuya: You've got to be kidding... //Traces of a struggle, a torn shirt -- Izumi's!// Shibuya: Kouji... Did you really... *trill of the phone* (131) Shibuya [runs to get it]: Yes! Takasaka [phone]: Ah, is that Katsumi? Where's Nanjo? Shibuya: He's not here! (Ouch -- broken glass!) Takasaka: Argh, not again! What's to do? We've been waiting for him all morning, and he hasn't shown up! Shibuya: He's been very disciplined with his work lately, so I thought... It's all my fault, I didn't pay enough attention... [As something occurs to him] Wait a second, Taka-chan! Unless -- [He rushes out onto the balcony -- which overlooks Izumi's schoolyard. No points for guessing why. Sure enough, Our Favorite Soccer Player is whipping his team into shape.] Izumi: Don't walk, run! Run! Pack of imbeciles! Are you all afraid of the ball or what! (132) Twenty goal shots, now! Hapless player #1: Wah! Izumi: Hey! Are you still asleep on your feet! Shibuya [with what I imagine to be immense relief]: ...He's here. (133) Takasaka: Huh? What? Nanjo's there? Shibuya: No, it's not that. He's not. (Whoa, sprinting up and down the field...) Takasaka: Hello? What did you just say, then? Shibuya: I think it should turn out all right... Takasaka: Ah? (Hello?) What -- I'm confused... [turning] Ah! (134) Na...NANJO! *hanging up* What happened to you! Look at you, you're hurt -- ah, blood! (135) Kouji [dans un état second as the French would say]: Sorry... I'm late. Shibuya: Wait! Hello-hello? Taka-chan? Argh, I can't stand it! (Why does he have to be so excitable?) Oh, well... guess he's still alive, anyway... The problem seems to be on the other end... (136) Hapless player #2: Urgh! [The point of the goaltender is to get in the way of the shot, not the opposite. But I digress.] HP #3: What is he trying to pull -- this sort of practice this early in the morning -- HP #4: Have mercy on us -- Minako-whom-you-saw-before: Hey, don't you find that Izumi-sempai is in a bad mood? Girl #2: He's covered with bruises. You think he was in a fight? Girl #3: Just give him the towel, Minako. Minako [clutching the towel]: All... right! (137) Aahh -- please help me God! Izumi: *panting* DISMISSED!! (138) [He goes and sticks his head under a fountain. (There should be a law against those shorts -- Kouji could use'em to plead aggravation.^^) As he comes up for air he notices where his wrists have been rubbed raw -- "and it all goes back to the night."] (139) *dokun dokun* [Flashbacks of his tied hands, Kouji kissing him... Izumi's eyes close and he slowly slides his arms around himself.] (140) *rustle of leaves* Izumi: WHO'S THERE! Minako: (Wah!) I -- I'm so--sorry... Pl--please take this to use! Please! Take it! I beg you! Izumi: Ah... no, it's all right. It'd get dirty. (141) Minako: That... Izumi-sempai! I like you! Izumi: Uh... Minako: I've been watching you. Izumi-sempai's so cool when he plays soccer. I really like you! (flshbk) //Kouji: I really like you... I love you, Izumi...// Minako: I'm sorry for coming out with this all of a sudden... But if Izumi-sempai doesn't have anyone at the moment, could you go out with me? (142) //I love you...// Izumi: ...Ah! Wait, this... Minako [taking to her heels]: (Eep -- I said it!) Izumi: ... (143) Shibuya: Ooh, quite the romantic atmosphere for such an early hour! (Just like a shoujo manga, bashful and sweet --) [Izumi favors him with the Death Glare.] //Shibuya: Whoa... guess the night _was_ stormy. (Those are hickies on his throat, I swear...)// Shibuya: What a cute girl; so that's the type who tends to like you. Quite the opposite of someone we both know -- Izumi: Did you meet up with him this morning? Shibuya: Hmm? No. He seems to have shown up at work, though. (144) Izumi: ...Tell that bastard that if he's got the guts, he can go ahead and kill himself. (145) Right in front of me. Takasaka: Could you please not give me a heart attack like that again! Wounded and not tending to it all night... (Wandering around town in that state, weren't you afraid of getting arrested?) Could you make an effort to take your standing into account! Do you hear me, Nanjo? (I do get angry, you know. I'm really getting angry!) (146) //My standing? I know it well. It's called despair.// (147) //I'm at the end of my rope.// (148) (149) *Izumi backhands Kouji* Random student: Oh! Kouji: I won't apologize. Last night's apology was for using force. (150) But as for what we did together, I'm not sorry at all. Izumi: Is that all you've got to say for yourself? Kouji: I can't put a knife through my heart. (151) Not when I know you're still alive -- not when I know you still breathe! Izumi: ... (152) -------------------------- Zetsuai 1989 by Minami Ozaki, volume 4, chapter 7 -------------------------- Translator's shorthand: (parentheses): smaller text in speech bubbles, flashback warning [brackets]: actions, other pictorial clues and translator's (extensive) notes //slashes//: voice-over boxes, thoughts *boldface*: sound F/X, emphasis ***: separation between chapters -------------------------- (153) Izumi: What did you say... Shibuya: _Stop it, the two of you!_ (154) Look at you! Arguing in public! Will you at least check out the surroundings? (Can't stand it!) Students: (What? What's going on? A fight --? Ah, forget it.) Izumi: ... [turns his back on them] Shibuya: Izumi -- Izumi: After school, come to the soccer club office. (155) _I want an explanation from beginning to end!_ Shibuya [sighing]: So much for my brilliant advice. What are you going to do now? Kouji: If I knew, things wouldn't be like this. (156) Shibuya: *sigh* He's beyond redemption. (But I can't leave well enough alone -- that's just the way I am.) What that moron must be thinking... God, he worries me. I can't just wash my hands of him... (157) //Can't wash my hands of him...// [Sign on the door says "Soccer Team."] Player: Captain. Captain... Aren't you going to come? Everyone's there already. Izumi: Oh. I still have some things to take care of; could you please tell everyone to do their warm-ups and basic exercises as usual. Player: All right. Izumi: *sigh* //He says... he loves me?// (158) //Does "love" mean you have the right to do those things? I don't understand --!// (flshbk) //Kouji: I love you, I love you, I can't stop!// //In other words, that's what it was that time too? And the other time?// [Flashbacks keep coming... Izumi grits his teeth and slams his fists onto the table.] (159) Kouji [appearing Touga Kiryuu-style in the doorway]: I thought about it all last night. You have no choice but to get rid of me, and the threat to you I embody. As long as I still have breath in me, I'll end by making you suffer; (160) I'll drive you to desperation. I'll defile you. Kouji: --But I can't do it no matter what. Maybe if I'm dead, you'd be free; free to run again under the sun... //To open your eyes in a gaze of heartfelt emotion; to open your lips to a hundred, a thousand words; to open your arms to love with all your strength in the days to come...// Kouji: Do you think anyone will ever love you more than I do? I can't accept this any longer! (161) If I carried out something like last night, you would definitely detest me. I did what I did because I wanted that. I thought that if I could hear you say with your own lips that you don't want me, I would be able to destroy myself. ...But I couldn't do it. Kouji: I don't know what to do in the slightest. From beginning to end, all I ever knew was that I love you, deeply. That's all. (162) //Kouji: I really love you... Izumi...// Izumi: I'm a guy. It's too unnatural. Kouji [with a very small smile]: Then... if I were a girl, would you like me? Izumi: ...! [There's this little gesture Ioana makes when I ask her a particularly obtuse question like "Have you ever pictured yourself as a gay man?" -- a hand-skip that indicates a mental leap she's not only never made, but never thought of making.] Kouji: If you were a girl, would it be okay for me to like you? Could something as simple as that allow me to like you! (163) Kouji: Izumi... Izumi: Don't... Don't touch me! I don't want you to touch me! Don't look at me like that! //Darling... I love you.// Izumi: How should I know the answer to that! (164) //I love you too --// Izumi: I don't know anything at all! Minako: Ah! Izumi [homicidal look]: ...! Minako: I... I was wondering... Sempai still didn't come out, did anything happen... So I... (165) Izumi: Ah... Minako: ...? Izumi: I... I think I can go out with you. (166) Minako: Aah... WHAT --- Izumi: ... [grits teeth and takes off running] (167) [Kouji stands in -- well, I don't think I have a word for it, really.] //I think I can go out with you...// (168) Serika: OH! Stupid Takuto-niichan, you're really too much! Why didn't you tell me! Izumi: It's not that... I was just looking for an opportunity to talk to you. Players: (See you, Captain...) Serika: When? When did you move? [Ozaki note: Serika's in high school now, so her uniform's different.] Izumi: About six months ago... Serika: (You've kept it from me for six months!?) Serika: I got a nasty shock when I heard the school had disappeared. It's only when I went to visit that the principal told me the eighty thousand yen Takuto-niichan gave them was a lot of help. He felt very sorry that the school had to close anyway, and wanted me to tell you that they'll be sure to pay you back the money. Takuto-niichan, when did you ever save up so much...? Izumi: Really... So it didn't work out after all... Serika: Eh? So where are you staying now? Izumi: Huh? (169) ...... Kouji's place... Serika: Oh --! Nanjo-san's home? What, really? (That's why you didn't want to tell me, isn't it?) Then I don't have to worry! [Call me paranoid, but I think she knows...^^] Serika: I was thinking about asking Mom and Dad when I got home. Because that would mean that Takuto-niichan was without a place to stay, wouldn't it? I mean, what if you were sleeping in parks or something. Izumi: Don't trouble yourself. Serika: Uhuh... (170) And also, I think it's a little weird, but there's a girl over there who's staring at you. (Woman's intuition.) Izumi: Huh... Oh. We're dating. Since two hours. Serika: HUH? You said... you're dating? Are you serious? Takuto-niichan! Izumi: Uhuh. (flshbk) //Minako: I feel like I'm dreaming... I still don't dare to believe it. Are you really, really willing to go out with me?// (171) //Really?// //Really...// //The words just sort of slipped out...// [Have I mentioned how sorry I feel for the poor girl? I feel sorry for her. She's an innocent bystander. She doesn't deserve it. Remind me to background check the next guy I ask out for any psychotic stalkers.] Izumi: ... Shibuya [from vantage point of balcony]: Hey, hey, hey! Where do you think you're going? How about dinner? I'm starving, Mr. Cafeteria Lady! (172) [Chauvinist pig. But the desired effect was achieved.] Shibuya: Hey, aren't you eating? (Bon appétit --) Aren't you heading out to your part-time job afterwards? It's a waste of good food. Izumi: ... Shibuya: Oh, right. Speaking of today... [mans the remote] TV: Now, the one that everyone's been waiting for -- please welcome Nanjo Kouji! Here tonight to perform his new single which will be released on the 25th (a live, exclusive sneak preview)! Izumi: ...!! TV: It seems that you wrote both the words and the music? (Quite an achievement.) You've instilled quite a bit of emotion into the piece. (Any connections with your personal life?) (173) Kouji [TV]: It's nothing much. I only put into song what was in front of my eyes... TV: Well, if we're going to discuss it any further, we might as well listen to it first. So without further ado, we'll let Nanjo Kouji present to you his song, "What Should I Do"! *applause* *rain machine* Shibuya: Whoa, lookit that -- rain in the studio. (What a stickler for presentation.) (174) [Kouji steps up to the mike. Would you believe this was the _one_ song I couldn't find someone else's translation for? Just my luck. It's not nearly as depressing as you would think, though: kinda late-80's Asian pop. Obviously.] Kouji: What should I do Faced with the future I can only stand In this invisible rain Impatience Apprehension Two hearts resenting one another No matter what you do No matter where you are My love is destined only for you Your laughter Your footsteps Unique, no one can replace you Why won't you let me love I adore you so much And yet you close your heart to me Why is it that I pursue And you always evade I hunger for acceptance in your arms What should I do There are no answers I don't want your disgust I don't want your hate... //I love you...// Izumi: ...Turn it off! Turn the damned thing off! Shibuya: Ack! [The remote hits the floor.] Kouji: Why don't you believe Why do you hesitate //Izumi...// Kouji: I'm by your side but distant as the sky //I love you...// Izumi: Don't sing! Kouji: Why do you pass on by Why do you turn away In the heavy, unceasing rain... //Izumi: What do I have to do to satisfy you!// **end volume 4**